Fantasia
by aquasnowlou
Summary: It's Aurelia's sixteenth birthday, but no one seems to care. On her way home, something strange happens and she finds herself in a foreign land. There are no roads, no cars, no buildings. How is she supposed to find her way home and deal with her handsome, and rather annoying new companion Rex? * I use DokuCraft, so the textures I describe will be slightly different.
1. Chapter 1

**Bombs are teleportation devices**

I'd always been in the background. As the second born child, my parents never really looked at me. They'd always pay attention to my talented older sister, with her awards and degrees, or my troublesome kid brother. However, I never really minded.

This time though, it was really too much. I mean, what parents would forget their own daughter's birthday? Apparently, my brother was running a high fever and my sister had another award ceremony. I get it; they don't have time for me. However, couldn't they have at least said happy birthday? Or, maybe they could give me a ride home after school!

I looked up at the rainy skies in disdain. It seems like even God was against me today. What a great sixteenth birthday! I didn't remember being such a bitter person, but being rained on when it's your sweet sixteen isn't exactly sweet. Being forgotten wasn't all that good either. As I contemplated this, a car rolled by, and a giant wave of water splashed on me. It must be fate!

"Fuck you!" I yelled at the car as it drove away. Unfortunately, cars aren't sound proof and the driver heard me. He stopped the car, rolled down the windows and responded to my cuss with a rude gesture that my grandmother would faint at. From what I could see, he was a big burly man with a face mean enough to scare the nastiest pit-bull you know. I wasn't stupid, even a child would know not to mess with this man. So like the coward I am, I quickly mumbled a half-assed apology and ran off.

It seems like I'm not even allowed to pick a fight!

As I continued my trudge home in the rain, I imagined how I would've beaten up that driver. Mind you, I can fight about as well as a fish can breathe in air. But no one can stop me from imagining that I can! As my soaked running shoes slapped against wet cement, I visualized each slap as a slap across his face.

Of course I barely knew the man, as he was just a stranger to me, but still, he was something to vent my frustrations… mentally. I mean, can I blame my six year old brother for being a sickly little thing? Can I blame my sister for being a perfect being? Well… yes, but they are family, and family was supposed to stick together.

Well, they did, but not for me.

My family was of German decent all around, which meant they were all blond haired, blue eyed, tall and beautiful.

So how does this relate to me being the odd one out? Well hold on! I'm getting to it!

You see, I have Sicilian blood in me. Now, how is this possible? Weren't both my parents German and blond? Was one of my great grandparents some Sicilian pirate or something? I wish it was something fantastical like that. However, I was the product of an affair my dad had.

My birth mother was a beautiful Sicilian immigrant who'd been a hopeless romantic. She ventured to Canada for the thrill of the untamed lands, and business opportunity. Here, she met my father, who was married at the time, and boom! I was conceived.

After I was born, she came wailing to my dad for responsibility. Dad accepted raising me, and gave her compensation money. As for mom, she pretty much walked home one day to see that she had a new kid. She didn't take it pretty well, but by some miracle their marriage survived and still managed to have my kid brother years later.

Mom is really a great woman. Even though I wasn't her child, she still tried her best to treat me just like her own. Of course, she wasn't perfect at it, since she preferred her own children, but she still loved me, despite the fact that I was a child of dad's mistress. Yeah, she's really a great woman.

As for my birth mother, she was heartbroken, and still jobless. Like a heroine from soap opera, she decided to return to her homeland so I never got to meet her.

This was all told to me by my father when I was nine. He said it without trying to cover anything up. One of the good things of my dad was that he was blunt. He said things without sparing my feelings at all. Back then, I hated him for it, but as I look back, I realized he'd done everything right. He was honest, and best of all, he'd never asked for forgiveness.

So, you think I love my mom and not my dad now? No! I love my dad the most. Even if he IS a cheating, blunt jerk of a man, he's still my dad. The saying says that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, if I called him a jerk, wouldn't I be one as well?

Ah, but I'm getting off topic.

Basically, because of my Sicilian birth mother, I have black hair and green-blue eyes. The only thing that even hints at my German heritage would be my pale skin. Whenever my family and I walk together, everyone would look at us and say:

"Wow what a beautiful family!"

"That little girl with the black hair is so cute!"

"She's probably the older girl's friend!"

I still recall the time that mom took me out for ice cream, and people thought she was kidnapping me.

So what am I getting to?

Well, basically, since I am the child of another woman, my mom doesn't treat me the same.

Since I have black hair, I don't look like my family.

I'm the outsider in my home.

Mom tries to convince me otherwise, but she's a terrible liar. Dad tries to be a good father, but he's never home enough. They are a good family, even if they forgot my birthday.

Not.

Only some kind, benevolent little sissy would be able to shrug this off. Last time I checked, I may be a sissy, but I'm still a far cry from the word kind, and benevolence is pretty much an alien concept to my mind. I am definitely a girl who will bear grudges!

So, in my opinion, I am allowed to rage and beat up people mentally!

I am allowed to stomp my feet on the wet sidewalks!

I can mutter profound language under my breath and stick my middle finger at random inanimate objects!

As I neared a corner, which I swore at, I noticed something brown, and quivering in the wind and rain.

I couldn't see well in the rain, so I didn't recognize what it was_. _However, it was _something_. Pity welled up in my heart when I considered it being an abandoned animal. It probably felt just like how I felt now. I approached it carefully, just in case it tried to attack me.

Finally when I got to the animal, I realized it wasn't an animal after all, in fact, it wasn't even alive. It was a brown paper bag.

I couldn't help it, I laughed.

I laughed at a paper bag.

I must be crazy… Or just sad.

It was just a brown paper bag. However, it was abandoned, like me, just lying there in the rain. Feeling a connection for the sorry wet bag of paper, I picked it up. It was a lot heavier than I anticipated, and ticked nicely in my hands… wait a minute… tick?

I opened the bag and inside, was the glinting of metal. Intrigued, I took the thing out of the bag. It appeared to be a metal ball with a little display screen on it. The screen flashed numbers, like a digital clock would, but the difference was that it wasn't showing the time; instead, it was counting down.

36,35,34,33,32…

I instantly recognized it thanks to all those spy movies I'd watched… it was a bomb, and it was about to detonate. Now if you were in my place, what would you do if you found a bomb in a paper bag? I don't know about you, but I know what I would do: I dropped the bomb and ran.

Let me get this straight, how often do you find a bomb on your way home? Not that often. Now, how often is this that you find a bomb on your way home, in the rain, and on your birthday? Even less often. I wasn't sure if I wanted to laugh or cry. Am I just the most unlucky person or what?

Suddenly, I remembered something from the news I saw recently, there had been a bombing in the city. I didn't mind it much, as I thought it was just some pissed off chemist. I mean, I live in Toronto, crazy things happen, but nothing really dangerous ever really just appears. Seriously, even if it IS Toronto. Canada, is still the forgotten peaceful dove of a country.

If this was a movie, the people would be demanding a refund. No one just FINDS a bomb in Canada. If I lived in the States, it might have just been a trashy bomb movie, but since this is CANADA, it's a trashy Canadian bomb movie! That's just absurd! I mean, how many times do you see the word bomb and Canada together?

Maybe I was being ignorant; but I just never really thought that I'd be unlucky enough to pick up a bomb on my way home.

Little did I know, I had just made a big mistake. I had been thinking as I was fleeing and as everyone knows, when you think, you slow down, and when you slow down when running away from a bomb, that's bad news.

However, I wasn't in the position to be thinking rationally then, as I was busy trying to escape a bomb. It was a bad case of stage fright… or bomb fright in my case.

I heard the bomb before I saw the light that emitted from it, and as the clichéd saying goes, everything went black.

….

Once I woke up, I realized two things: first, I'm probably dead. Second, heaven is sort of… empty. I got onto my feet and looked around. All I saw was pretty much: desert, desert, and desert. No, not that creamy cake your mom claims to be homemade, but the sandy wasteland that seems to stretch on forever.

I felt ripped off. Where is the freaking garden? Where are the chubby angels that sing horrible carols every day? If heaven had a lawyer, I think I'd sue for false claims. Also, I was filthy! There was sand all over my body, and I was sure there was sand in my hair. It had already dried by now, knotted and crusted with sand. I thought heaven was supposed to be all pristine and beautiful, not some nasty desert!

Ok, I was being a bit melodramatic, but I HATE heat and the sweat beads already forming on my forehead are not extremely elating. It didn't help my mood that my body was caked in sand.

Well, the desert had its own beauty, I'd give it that. However, I was hot and dirty. The two combinations didn't allow me to appreciate it at all.

After all, wasn't this supposed to be in some sort of paradise?

I was suddenly struck with the idea that… maybe… I might not be dead after all! I mean, I've seen astral projection movies, and Sci-Fi's about parallel universes. So… maybe the bomb sent me here through some wormhole or something? At this point, you might call me crazy, I probably was, but I would rather believe that the bomb teleported me to an alternate reality, than to believe that I got blasted to bits, and heaven is a desert.

That's right; I'd rather believe that bombs are teleportation devices.

I took off my raincoat; I didn't exactly think I'd need it anymore. Then I started my quest to look for shade. After all, I didn't plan to stay in the desert that long now did I?

My search for shade wasn't exactly easy, and it was extremely long. So, I will skip the tedious details. Basically, I wandered around in the desert, sweating my butt off for quite a while, and then finally stumbled across a forest.

In case you were wondering, no, I wasn't starting to see things, there was actually a forest… however I do admit I saw a walking cactus… it was probably a mirage from the desert. Fine! I might be a bit dehydrated, but still, the coolness of the forest was no lie!

Okay, you probably expect me to take on an adventurous attitude, and start exploring the forest right? Well, hell no! I'm tired, filthy, and I ache all over from walking all that much. Not to mention, I got blasted into the place by a bomb! So, what do you think I'm going to do now?

Well, what would you do?

The answer is obvious, you would find a big tree, sit down, and sleep… that's what I did.


	2. Chapter 2

**Always look down when you bathe**

I woke up to find myself in a dilemma. Let me describe my situation: there are a pack of wolves surrounding my tree. However, that was not my problem, as, they did not seem vicious. So what was my dilemma?

Basically, it was that my bladder has been stretched to the maximum capacity with my liquid waste. That causes me great discomfort. In addition, if kept inside the body for too long, it will poison me from the inside. Thus, I have to excrete the waste immediately.

In translation, I needed to go pee.

I needed to go pee badly.

I needed to go pee, where there were no washrooms.

You might laugh, however, I've never been camping all my life, I've only heard of outhouses in books! So, with a full bladder, I carefully stepped away from the friendly wolves. This was done with great difficulty of course, as doing anything when you have to pee is suddenly two times harder. The wolves didn't chase me, and for that I was grateful.

At that point, my need to pee had escalated to the point I was seeing red. I suddenly remembered how my dog would always do her business on a tree or bush. Inspired by that memory, I quickly dove for a nearby bush… and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, the sighs of relief.

Now that I didn't have a full bladder to worry about, other needs brought themselves to light. I was suddenly hungry, thirsty, and I smelled putrid. Hunger I can deal with, thirst, I could handle, but to smell like a dead horse? Maybe you can stand it, but I can't.

Let me tell you something about myself: my personality is what most people would call a housewife. I might be mediocre at most things, but give me a broom, and a house, and I'm practically Shiva with all my hands flying everywhere to clean up the place. Most people can boast about their singing, dancing, or academic talents. I can boast about my cleaning skills.

My other skill is cooking. No one can make a better soufflé than I, and my pastries can rival that of a chief's. In fact, my dream job is to be a pastry chef. Dad always said I was probably born with an apron, a broom in my left hand, and a spatula in my right hand. As for me, I say I was just born naked, red-faced and squishy looking like every other newborn.

Did I mention that I'm just a bit afraid of the dark?

I've never talked about this previously, but around the time I got bombed, it was about four o'clock. When I woke up, the slant of the sun suggested afternoon, so about five o'clock. Now if I walked for approximately three more hours, and slept for another, what time would it be now?

About nine o'clock.

What happens at nine o'clock? I don't know about you, but unless you live in Antarctica or the Arctic, the sun has already set around this time.

Have you ever been in a forest in the dark?

Let me tell you, it's not exactly beautiful and cheerful.

Everything seemed to be alive, and I could see things _moving_ in the forest. I could've sworn I saw a skeleton under a tree. It looked quite real under the moonlight and its pale complexion –if you counted bones as a complexion- could give Edward Cullen a run for his money!

What's so scary about a skeleton? Well, not much, since I've had my fair share of Halloweens and horror movies, but this one was _moving._

If it was dead and unmoving, I would've been fine. However, there's just something about an animated pile of bones that was just much more terrifying than your garden variety skeleton. To make things worse, it was carrying a bow and wearing armour! Now, seeing a skeleton with a bow was quite impressive and terrifying, but seeing an armoured skeleton with a bow was just too much!

I could almost imagine the horror fans booing at this plot development: What story features animated skeletons with armour and bows? A terrible third rate one what's what!

In case you haven't noticed that already, I'm a movie buff! Dad and I watch a movie with each other every Friday night, and let's just say after weekly doses of movie for all my sixteen years, I've pretty much memorized all the plotlines in every movie, no matter how new.

Now, my movie- filled mind supplied me with various options to deal with this abominable creature. Let me tell you, my options weren't good:

Option 1.  
Give a heroic shout, point my sword at the skeleton, charge, and defeat it with my steroid-induced muscles bulging in every move.

Option 2.

Scream shrilly, like a girl caught in a shower by a homicidal maniac, and run away, tripping over something stupid, and await my doom.

Option 3.

Open up my magical spell book, bind the scary skeleton to me with a spell, and make it my eternal minion… while laughing manically of course.

All of them seemed quite interesting, but unfortunately, I didn't have a sword, my throat was on fire from the lack of water, basically rendering it impossible for me to scream, and magical spell books didn't just appear in mid-air. Also, these options are all sheer idiocy, and only a moron would execute them.

I opted for a fourth option: sneak stealthily away like a little coward.

I pictured myself blending into the shadows like a female ninja, and walking with silent feet. However, once I finally took a step… _**SNAP!**_

Great! I'd just barely begun to sneak away, but I step on a branch immediately!

Luckily, it didn't seem to notice me… well, its head didn't turn towards me. I breathed a sigh of relief, and pretty much sprinted away with the fervor of a madwoman, I didn't want to take a chance.

Okay, it seems that I'm paranoid as well, but better safe than sorry! I'd much rather be the coward that runs away, than the idiotic warrior that would probably die. I wasn't too sure I wanted to be the first person that wasn't from a horror movie to be killed by a skeleton.

I stopped running once I reached a clearing. There was something about that place that made me feel a lot safer. There was also the tiny fact that I was out of breath; I wasn't what people would call physically fit.

After I caught my breath, I decided to retreat into the woods and cower until the sun rises again... However, I stopped short when I heard something… the sound of trickling water! Alright, I was looking for a reason to stay in the clearing, but a reason is a reason!

With that twisted logic, I threw all caution to the wind and sprinted towards the sound. The water seemed to be calling my name like a siren. Now let me tell you, Sirens are some serious business. What are sirens? Well you certainly need to brush up on your Greek mythology. They are pretty much beautiful women who call people to the sea and drown them.

No one refuses beautiful women, and I never refuse water.

Finally, I found the source of the water: a small pond, a small STEAMING pond. It was a hot spring! The spring water smelled awful, like rotten eggs, but I ignored it. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen! I'm so touched! To see water, in any form, is like a blessing when you are parched.

Without thinking, I took a huge scoop of water in my hands and gulped it down. The water tasted like… hot lemonade! It was delicious! At that moment, the water tasted even better than any juice or coke I'd ever drunk! Of course, at the time, to me even muddy water would taste good.

I slurped down as much water as I can until I could not drink anymore. Then, I started washing my face with it. Before I knew it, I had already removed my sneakers, and stepped into the hot spring. Warm water greeted me and brushed gently against my bare feet.

Now this is heaven!

Encouraged by the warmth, I stripped myself of all clothing, and waded into the spring. Obviously, I wouldn't have ever done it back home. I mean, would a logical person take off their clothes in a forest at night in a random hot spring? However, my day has been a far cry from logical, so, I'm allowed. Besides, no one can deprive a girl of her right to bathe!

I waded deeper and deeper into the spring until I was waist deep. The water brushed against my skin soothingly, inviting me even deeper. Slowly, I stepped forward, and allowed myself further into the hot spring's embrace.

Finally, I was up to my neck in the blissful warmth of the hot spring. So entranced by the soothing water, I barely noticed I was still being pulled by a current to the center of the spring. When I reached the center…I fell down.

Yes, I fell.

It is possible to fall in water.

However, I think I'm the only human being in the world to have ever experienced this circumstance as I fell. Why? Because there was a hole in the middle of the hot spring!

I'm not an exceptional swimmer. However, I could swim against currents. But when you're dropping from a hole in the middle of a hot spring, in a 90o drop, I doubt even Hercules can swim against it! I would like to tell you that somehow I managed despite my lack of athletic abilities, and swam back up to the spring, but I didn't.

Since I'm not even as strong as Hercules, all I could do is to pray to whatever God that ruled over hot springs, or German Sicilians and hope I didn't die from my fall. Of course I tried my best to struggle against the stream of water pushing me down, but eventually, what feeble strength I had, tired out, and nature prevailed.

What? You want me to describe how it looked like? As if I can! Excuse me, but I was a bit too preoccupied trying to claw my way back up! Fine! You want a description?

Just imagine a hot spring, and in the middle of it, there was a hole one meter wide in the ground. Obviously, if there is a hole, there will be water draining into it. As it falls, the water will gain momentum. The further it falls, the faster it gets. In the end, it would have the speed and strength of a waterfall.

I don't know how far it would fall, but I wasn't in the position to look down. What? What do you mean I shouldn't be so stingy about describing it!? Do you even remember my circumstances? I was still trying to swim back up!

I wish mom told me what to do when bathing in a hot spring… I mean, are all hot springs like this?

In my head, I pictured what she would've said to me:

"_Mom, what should I do when bathing in a hot spring that may or may not have a hole in it and make me fall to certain death?"_

"_Well, Aurelia, the first thing you should do is to always look down when you bathe…"_

Finally, I ran out of breath, since you just don't get sucked into a gaping hole of water and still be able to breathe.

Everything started to go fuzzy around the edges, and my ears started to buzz like a mosquito was next to it.

So what happened next?

I fainted.


	3. Chapter 3

**To know the recipe for Grinding Balls into paste**

Every time I wake up, something bad seemed to happen. As a result, when I woke up to a warm brush of air against my face, I was incredibly weary. Dreading what was to come, I kept my eyes shut; I didn't want to see what was going to happen to me this time. Thankfully, I did not feel decapitated nor was I bleeding to my death, so that was good.

Through my eyelids, I could see a warm glow of light. I would tell you what I could smell as well, but my nose was still clogged with water from almost drowning.

Eventually, I gathered enough courage to crack open an eye.

The first thing I saw, was a mouth.

Yes, a mouth.

It was a really good-looking mouth, and slightly parted to reveal a hint of pearly teeth, white as those in toothpaste commercials. Of course, the mouth was attached to a face as well, and the face, was drop-dead gorgeous.

It also appeared that the owner of the face was sleeping, which would explain the warm air on my face. Suddenly, I realized I was on my back, in a soft comfortable bed! Not only that, the guy seemed to be there with me… I was in bed with a gorgeous guy! And he looked about my age!

"…!"

I couldn't be more stunned, had my luck just turned around?

My eyes turned into little hearts and my heart rate sped up to 100km/hr.

So? Call me vain! Gorgeous guys were created to be ogled at! There's nothing wrong with that! Who cares if I got bombed, woke up filthy, and nearly drowned to my death! There is a gorgeous guy in front of me!

Now don't get me wrong, I've seen many a hot guy in my life, however, this one in particular exceeded all expectations!

Describe him? That's impossible! He was just so perfect looking that I can't even begin to describe him without sounding like a complete love stuck idiot!

Simply speaking, he just looked like the Greek statue of Adonis has come alive. If you do not know who Adonis is, he was considered the most beautiful man. Of course, in all Greek stories, it's always the beautiful people that suffer, so Adonis died.

Ah, I'm getting off topic.

So, perfection aside, the guy seemed to have smooth caramel coloured skin, dark red wavy hair the colour of liquorish, and eyelashes to make Cover Girl models cry. His nose was carefully sculpted with a slight tilt at the tip, making it a touch too proud. As for his mouth, the perfect mouth, they looked like delicious succulent red jujubes, full and rosy, just waiting for a slight nibble…

Suddenly, his eyes flipped open. Of course, his eyes didn't disappoint either. They were the colour of emeralds, shining somehow, and glittering in the light. Maybe he sensed my intense ogling or maybe the predator's gleam in my eyes… or maybe both. As they say, even a sleeping mouse would detect a cat. But don't blame me! He was so gorgeous; it was like having steak for the eyes!

The steak… I mean… gorgeous guy, revealed a god-like smile at me. I could only ogle even more, and open my mouth like an idiot. Then, he opened his perfect mouth…

"Would you kindly wipe the drool of your face?"

Even his voice was sexy! So smooth and low, with the… wait… did he just say drool?

_Noooooooo! I can't believe I was drooling in front of the gorgeous guy! Now I'll never get a chance to win him over!_

Of course, that thought was thoroughly decorated with F-bombs and such, however, if I earned one cent every time I swore in my head, I'd have one million dollars by the end of the day. Basically, my point is, if I repeated every f*** thought of mine un-edited, then every sentence I think would look like this:

F******************************************************************************

My face instantly turned as red as the butt of a monkey. In fact, I felt like burying my face my butt to hide the shame. Wait wouldn't that be impossible?

Woodenly, I lifted a hand to wipe it away hastily.

"Thanks" I mumbled

He chuckled in response… is there anything about him that's not sexy?

I couldn't help but ogle him more. However, my ogling was interrupted by the knocking of a door.

Yes, the door. I was inside. Not only was I inside, but in a tiny hut-looking house. It was made of wood and cobblestone, and lighted by a blue glowing thing in the roof. As far as I could see, the room I was in, was the only room in the entire house, as I could see the door about 5 metres away from me. The house was also sparsely decorated. The only pieces of furniture I could see, was the bed I was in, a stone furnace, a large chest, a workbench, and a large chest. As for the wall, it was bare, except for a little painting.

_Thump thump thump_

The force of the knocking on the door sent light tremors in the painting. Suddenly, I understood how the three little pigs felt. I could almost hear the wolf huffing and puffing.

I opened my mouth to ask him what was happening, but before I could even say a word, he put his hand on my mouth.

"shhh, pretend you are asleep"

His eyes were full of urgent concern. Suddenly, I understood whoever was out there, wasn't going to be the friendly next door neighbour.

I nodded obediently and closed my eyes.

He breathed a sigh of relief and took his hand away. Then, he silently slid out of the covers and padded softly to where the door was.

"Who is it!" he called

"You know who we are Rex!" a gruff voice called "We're here to kill the witch!"

Rex sighed again, and I heard his footsteps toward the door. The creaking of hinges followed. I couldn't believe it! Why would he open the door? Those people sounded murderous!

Sounds of footsteps crowded into the hut, and I tried my best to keep my sleeping façade.

"Rex, stand back, we're going to destroy the witch"

"No, she's still sleeping, she can't even defend herself!"

"Then all the better! It won't hurt us!"

"What if she isn't a witch? She looks completely harmless!"

Nervous shifting of weight and awkward silence followed his words. Talking advantage of the Silence, Rex pressed on.

"I am the one who found her in the sacred spring. Even if she is a witch, she is by our law, my responsibility. If you so much as dare touch her, it will be an insult to me, the son of the village head." He paused dramatically before continuing.

"I am also the warrior of this village. If you break the law, and hurt what is rightfully mine, I might be so upset I might be incapable of defending you."

He let the barely concealed threat hang potent in the silence. Soon, murmurs of fear and dispute filled the room. If I wasn't pretending to be asleep, I think I would applaud him. He would make a great lawyer.

From what I could deduce from this conversation… if you could call it a conversation, would be that whoever was in the room, wanted me dead. Even a monkey would figure that out, with all their "kill the witch" talk. As for the gorgeous guy named Rex, he seems to be trying to protect me.

After what seemed like an eternity, the guy with the gruff voice, who was the apparent leader, spoke:

"My apologies… _Sir…_ I didn't mean to overstep my bounds with your _property_."

He bit his words out sarcastically, making me hate him more with each second.

"Apology accepted, now get out! All of you!" Rex's voice rang with authority. The sound of retreating footsteps quickly followed.

I waited until I heard the door close before opening my eyes and sitting up.

To say I was confused would be a downright lie. I was completely overwhelmed with questions!

Rex turned around from the door, and looked at me. I looked back, with what I hoped to be a questioning look.

"You probably want some answers I suppose…" He gave me a quick grin.

"That would be an understatement."

He smiled at my reply, and let an easy smile grace his lips. Then, he walked over to the large chest and plopped himself down.

"I would tell you, but I'm too busy enjoying the view." he pointed a finger at my chest.

Automatically, I looked down to see… I was completely naked!

I instantly grabbed the blanket and tried to hide my bare form with it. How embarrassing! I can't believe he never mentioned this before! What a jerk!

By now, my face had turned even redder than a monkeys butt, if that was even possible.

Dimly, I recalled what had happened to my clothes: they were probably still on the grass where I left them when I took a bath in that retarded hot spring! Fuck! Even if I wanted to blame him, I was the stupid person that took off my clothes in the first place… However, he could've at least told me in a nicer way!

Seeing my reaction, Rex began to howl with laughter. Before long, he was rolling on the ground with tears in his eyes.

Being laughed at did not make me any happier, in fact, I was furious!

"You're a jerk!" I screeched. My voice rose to Opera Singer levels.

That shut him up, and allowed me a fleeting taste of victory.

However, I couldn't even saver it.

Why?

Because nothing I do ever go as planned.

His face went pale, and before he could say anything, the door flew open from behind him.

A tall boy about seven feet tall stomped in. if not for his intimidating muscles, he also had a very good looking face. His face was strong and chiseled, with brown hair and eyes. There was also a mischievous air to him that made him look very wild. With my quick assessment, I decided that he was handsome in a rogue sort of way. He looked my age, and his skin tone matched Rex's

"I knew it! She was just pretending to be asleep!" he fumed. His voice was gruff, deep, and awfully familiar… it was the leader of the mob from before!

Rex quickly put up an arm in front of him, blocking him from entering any further.

"That does not make a difference Finn. You are not allowed to hurt her."

The guy called Finn snorted, "Since when did you ever care about a woman Rex? Besides, I'm alone now; the others went back to bed. After all, it's midnight. I only wanted to take a look at the witch."

With that, Rex visibly relaxed and lowered his arm, letting Finn push past him.

Finn studied me for a long time with his intense brown eyes, and whistled.

"Wow, for a witch, it sure is pretty. No wonder you want to keep it alive."

"She's not an "it" and she can understand you perfectly." Rex frowned

"Whatever you say sir." Finn replied easily.

He stepped closer to me, and cupped my face in his hands.

"Hmmn, not that I have a look at you close up, you don't look so inhuman anymore"

It hurts! His hands were rough against my skin, and it had the scent of dirt…Dirt? His hands were covered in dirt, and he dares to touch my face!

Okay, that's it. I flung my right hand out, and slapped him across the face…hard.

Smack!

"First of all, I'm not a witch! Second of all, you don't just call me it! I'm most definitely a human being! Third, you don't just go up to a girl and touch her face without permission! Especially with such filthy hands! How would you like it if I grinded your balls and turned them into paste! I know the recipe!"

There was a strange satisfaction in yelling at the big brute of a guy. It was particularly satisfying to see him rubbing the side of the face I slapped. It was even more satisfying to see that it was already starting to swell up! However, all feelings of satisfaction vanished when I looked into his eyes.

_If looks could kill…_

"Why you little Bitch! "

His eyes bulged with temper and he pulled his arm back, his hands forming a fist. As for me, I knew I had no time to dodge that. So, I closed my eyes and waited for the impact of his punch.

Clang!

I opened my eyes at the unexpected sound. In front of me, stood Rex, looking every inch like a hero from a movie. Apparently, Finn's punch met not my face, but the flat of a metal sword in Rex's hands.

"Stay away from her Finn" Rex warned

"But!" Finn protested, his voice taking on a whine, "She started it!"

"That's enough!" Rex yelled,

"You have been relieved of your duties hours ago! Go back to your home, and think on your actions! Or do you plan to disobey this simple order?"

With this, Finn's huge shoulders slumped in defeat, and he mumbled a tiny "yes sir"

"You know the way out."

Rex pointed at the door. His message was clear: "get the hell out!" Finn looked up and gave Rex an apologetic look, then turned his head slightly to glower at me. I returned the favour by sticking my tongue out at him, like a child.

To be behind a guy with a sword gave me a lot more courage, so I even discreetly stuck my middle finger at him.

A vein on Finn's forehead popped, and he clenched his fist. However seeing no way around Rex, he turned around, and quietly closed the door behind him.

Once the door clicked close again, Rex slumped onto the floor, and sighed. He dropped his sword on the ground, combed through his hair with his fingers.

I mustered up the sweetest voice I could, and tried to thank him

"Thank you for saving-"

He held up a hand to stop me, eyes flashing with anger.

"Do you have any idea what would've happened if I wasn't there? He would've killed you, and no one would blame him! Can you at least keep your tongue in check? You are already in a precarious position, with half the village thinking you are a witch! I…"

Yeah yeah, I get it! I should stop slapping rude guys who have nasty, dirt covered hands, especially if they think I'm a witch.

I left him to his ranting and tuned him out. As the patient person I am… sort of, I waited for him to finish blowing his steam. As I spaced out, I realized that I was still embarrassingly nude! After he finishes his jabbering, I will ask him for some clothes!

After what seemed like forever, he finally calmed down and took a deep breath. Seeing my chance, I opened my mouth.

However, before I could ask him about clothing, he cut me off with a brilliant smile.

"Do you really know the recipe for grinding balls into paste?


	4. Chapter 4

**I am Godzilla**

Ever since I was little, my mother had always been the essence of ladylike grace, and expected me to follow suite. This meant that I was never allowed to wear ripped jeans, have messy hair, or wear a dirty shirt. Don't even mention profanity. If anyone just as much mouthed the word "damn", my mother would be on her way, soap in hand, and ready to clean this world of unladylike filth.

Why do I suddenly mention my mother?

This is because, if she could hear me right now, no soap in the world would be good enough to clean my so-called filth. In fact, I think she'd faint… elegantly of course.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU UUUCK!"

In case you were wondering, I do not habitually break out into a scream of profanity, as tempting as it is. However, as my neck was screaming bloody murder, I consider myself to be justified.

"You sound like a dying chicken." Rex remarked, lifting a perfect brow at me.

"You're lying." I glared up at Rex from the bed. I know exactly how I sound! In fact, I'm very sure that I sound like a dying mule going through labor!

"Well if you don't sound like one, you sure look like one."

With that comment, Rex gave me a little smirk and turned back to whatever he was doing before my colourful outburst. All I could do was stare at his retreating back with complete indignation.

How dare he compare me to poultry!

However, try as I may, I could not help but find his description of my current position quite… fitting. My neck was tucked into my right shoulder, in a very unrealistic position, not very unlike a chicken when it is sleeping. I couldn't seem to even move it a single centimetre without hearing ominous cracks and experiencing blinding pain. Of course, I did not want to be positioned like that, but since I slept in an awkward position, it is no surprise.

I shot Rex a dirty look, wishing him a certain fate that I will not describe due to it being too gruesome and disgusting. Truth be told, my current state of affairs is all thanks to him!

Let me recount:

After dirt-hand Finn left, Rex lectured me non-stop. To the point, I, the most patient and gentle of souls, finally had enough. What I call "all hell broke loose" shortly ensued. We ended up yelling –quietly mind you, I learned my lesson after what happened with Finn- at each other until both of us used up all our strength.

We ended up falling asleep on top of each other mid-argument. When I woke up, I found his back resting uncomfortably on my left shoulder and his weight pushing my head towards my right shoulder. Needless to say, it's his fault that my head has now aligned with my right shoulder!

To make things worse, the minute I finally shook Rex awake, he only burst out into laughter! Though I admit, if I wasn't the person whose head was turned ninety degrees to the right, I'd be laughing at myself too.

I muttered another unintelligible word, as I gently massaged my stiff neck with the tip of my fingertips. Hopefully, I can work the knot out and allow my head to move again.

Suddenly, a sweet aroma wafted into my nose… delicious…soft… familiar… the scent of… COOKIES! My stomach instantly grumbled in want of this delicious treat. I turned my eyes to look for the delicacy, and discovered Rex holding a plate of soft and warm looking cookies. He smiled and put the cookies right in front of me. I looked at him with bewildered eyes… was this really for me?

"Help yourself"

Well in that case… then I won't hold back! Immediately, both my hands grabbed for the cookies, and I began stuffing my face. Eating sideways was a bit of a challenge, however I managed.

"Don't get your shirt all dirty" Rex warned.

I looked up at him, cookie in mouth, and gave him a disbelieving expression. Let me explain: the night before, Rex had given me some new clothes. It was simple clothing, just a shirt and pants, but better than nothing. Yes, eating politely and minding the shirt would be the right thing to do. However, I was not going to start eating all gracefully, and mind crumbs, when my head is bent in such an ungraceful way!

No matter how hard I try, I don't really think it's possible to do anything graceful when your head is tucked into your shoulder!

"Never mind… I didn't say anything…"

Rex slumped his shoulder in defeat. Seeing his reaction, I happily resumed my actions of pigging out. As I ate, Rex sneakily snuck behind me…. And…

_CRACK_

"ARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHMMMMMMPHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHH!"

A violent explosion of half chewed cookie sprayed from my mouth. I whipped my head furiously back to look at the horrible bastard.

"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY NECK? THAT HURTS LIKE FUCKING HELL!"

As I yelled this, more pieces of half chewed cookies sprayed from my mouth, and found its way to Rex's face. By the end of the sentence, more than one third of Rex's face was covered in saliva-coated, half chewed cookie pieces.

Looking at his cookie-coated face, I felt an evil satisfaction. Then, I turned back to my cookies… wait…

Did I just manage to turn my head? I tilted my head from left to right, testing it out. I felt no pain, which meant I was cured… OH MY GOD! Rex probably just helped me with my neck, and I spat cookies on him!

I looked back at Rex's cookie covered face, guiltily.

"Rex… um…"

"Save it." He replied calmly… too calmly, "I already knew something like this was going to happen, so I was very prepared"

He took out a handkerchief and wiped his face clean. Once he was nice and clean again, I could tell that his face was also serene… so serene it was scary. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise.

"Rex… I'm so sorry"

I looked at him tearfully, using every bit of my feminine charm I could muster. Of course this just meant batting my eyelashes pathetically.

Rex did not answer me, but instead took out something from a pocket.

It was a little chrome clock. When I say clock, I say it in a vague manner, as it wasn't one of your garden variety clocks. Instead of little hands pointing at numbers, it showed a tiny mechanical sun moving across a tiny blue sky. . The clock didn't really make sense to me; however, it apparently did to Rex.

He looked up at me grimly, and made a forced smile.

"Well, it doesn't matter if I forgive you or not right now, because we're going to your trial very soon."

I nodded gravely at him; I knew what was going to happen to me.

Last night, while we were arguing, Rex managed to instill some basic knowledge of the world to me.

Apparently, I'm in a place called Fantasia. According to Rex, Fantasia was created by the Goddess after one day. She created the world from a seed. Once it grew big enough, she placed all sorts of living creations in it. To make things balanced, she made magical creatures as well as mundane creatures. To balance the two very different types, she created the humans to be the mediators…

She sounds like a stuck up bitch who expected humans to take care of all her dirty work.

Wanting her precious new creations to be happy, the Goddess created different biomes to suit the needs of the living creatures

So, what's a biome? From what I heard from Rex, a biome is just a piece of land forever trapped in an eternal season. In fact, Rex doesn't even know what a season is! A forever snowing biome or an ever green biome would be a common thing to see. .. Or so he says.

There are also different types of animals that live here. Pigs, cows, sheep, and chicken are the main types of animals that inhabit this place. Rex calls them passive mobs, I just call them livestock.

So far, this place sounds like a normal parallel universe right? WRONG, in every parallel universe, there is always some sort of threat. What is the problem in this place? Let me explain: at night, skeletons, zombies, and various other monsters appear! Which would mean, that skeleton I saw, wasn't just a figment of my dehydrated imagination after all!

Now, where does all this "witch" stuff come in?

Well, legend has it, there are some women who are born with the talents of the goddess. However they have shunned society, and work in the name of evil. Rumors has it that she has green skin, and a long nose with warts on it.

Which brings this back to me.

When I fell, in all my naked glory from that hot spring into this so-called "sacred spring" of the village, it was like I was asking for those people to be suspicious.

I sobbed to myself internally… why is it that I have such bad luck?

Sighing, I helped myself to another cookie.

"What in the nether are you doing?" Rex looked at me, eyes big and exasperated.

"Mmmmph, mmmmmph, waaaahhhm" I replied.

Obviously, I was having a cookie! Didn't he have eyes?

"Never mind, I didn't ask anything, just finish your stupid cookies so we can go." He rolled his eyes at me, and shifted his wait to one leg.

Seeing that he was going to give me time to have more cookies, I didn't hesitate; I grabbed the entire plate, and tilted it towards my mouth, letting the cookies slid in. I probably looked like a chipmunk with all the food in my mouth, but I didn't care, with a couple of good chews, I managed to scarf down all the cookies in one go.

I turned towards Rex, who was completely red faced from trying not to laugh. He was about to say something to me, when we heard heavy knocks on the door.

All traces of humour fled from his face, and replaced by a stern one. nervously, I tried feebly to smooth down my wild black hair.

"Come in" Rex said, sounding very impressive and authoritative.

The door opened to reveal dirt-hand Finn. He looked rather shabby, and tired, yet still enormously frightening. However, I got a bit of satisfaction in seeing his face was now sporting an angry red handprint. Without even looking at me, he turned towards Rex.

"So you're the one they sent to escort us" Rex smiled, with a hint of amusement in his voice

"Of course _sir_, since I didn't want you to run off with that witch of yours." Finn replied, breaking off to give a disgruntled look at me. "I wanted to see to it myself that she didn't manage to seduce you so that she'd escape"

Rex glared at him, as though he was about to turn dirt-hand Finn, into Dirt-minced-meat Finn. Unfortunately, he thought better of it, and instead, he just gave Finn a mildly displeased look, and went to grab his sword

"Come on then, and hurry up. Daylight is running out" Finn chuckled after that, as though he'd made a good joke. He opened the door, and executed a very irritating bow.

Rex swung his sword onto his back, and grabbed my hand.

"Stay close to me" he whispered

I nodded and tried to keep my heart from beating too fast, and prayed I wasn't sweating.

Of course, given the situation, it wasn't appropriate to go boy crazy, but it wasn't every day I get to hold the hand of a very sexy and attractive guy, so I supposed I'm forgiven. I mean, he was the literal definition of "drop dead gorgeous", and "god's gift to women".

While he led me towards the exit, I hesitated a bit, feeling a bit peckish. Rex gave me a small smile of reassurance, and led me out.

As I stepped outside of the tiny house for the first time, I realized something was off about the sky. It was opaque, and grey… like stone. It didn't take a genius to figure out that I was in a cavern, a really large, circular looking cavern. The entire place was light up by little blue blocks of light that sparkled like diamonds, and twinkled like stars. I opened my mouth in delight, and was just about to ask what it was, until I remembered the severity of my situation.

I was about to get tried for witchery, led by dirt-hand Finn to my doom. Not exactly what my life goal.

Abruptly, Rex stopped, and my face smashed into his back.

"Ouch." I complained, mildly rubbing my nose

"We're here" Rumbled Finn's annoying and intimidating voice.

I looked around to realize that we've arrived to a circular spring, not much unlike the one I fell through. The only difference was a large jet of water that seemed to be gushing from the ceiling of the cavern and into the spring, splashing rainbow coloured mists of water into my face.

The realization came to me that this particular spring was probably the "sacred spring" that Rex had talked about, as well as the spring where apparently Rex apparently found me in.

A tug on my hand from Rex spun me around, and I found myself looking at a group of people. All of them shared Rex's skin colour, but that was all that they had in common. They appeared to be in all different heights, and ages. The only other thing that they all shared was the look of fear in their eyes. My eyes caught the gaze of the little toddlers staring at me. The little boy whimpered and hid into the folds of his mother's dress.

_Good job Aurelia_, I thought to myself, _you went from wimp to being able to scare little toddlers. You must be the new Godzilla._

The sound of a throat being cleared drew my attention to an old man. He looked quite hale in his old age, and sported a wizardly beard. Though I could barely detect it, he looked very similar to Rex, especially how he held himself with such authority and dignity. He opened his mouth, and spoke in a clear and sonorous voice

"We have gathered today, my dear village, to determine whether this woman is a witch and threat to our village…"

I tuned him out, not very interested in his announcement of what I already knew. As if sensing my disinterest, Rex turned his head to look at me, with a slight grin.

"Just so you know, if you don't make it, it was nice meeting you. Even if you did spray cookies onto my face" he whispered

"Likewise" I replied quietly

"It just occurred to me, that I don't even know your name." he gave me a cute smile

"I am Godzilla… I mean Aurelia" I blushed. Trust me to mess up even introducing myself.

Our conversation was cut short as the deep voice boomed:

"…this trial begins now!"

Rex squeezed my hand, and I took a deep breath.

"Good Luck Aurelia."


End file.
